My four-year-old son is really into knock-knock jokes, and consequently, so is my two-year-old daughter. She has no idea what she’s saying or what they mean, but she thinks she’s hysterical. So the other night, while I was out running errands, my husband gave the kids fish sticks for dinner and decided to turn the fish sticks into a knock-knock joke.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Fish!
Fish who?
Fish for dinner! Eat your fish sticks!
Hilarious, right? Well, my little Sophie thought it was hilarious, and kept telling it over and over, in her typical loud exuberance. Only when she tells, it, it sounds like this:
Knock, knock.
(who’s there?)
B*TCH!
(fish who?)
ha ha ha ha B*TCH! ha ha ha ha!
Yeah. As hard as we tried to get her to pronounce the “f” and the “sh” sounds, it just keeps coming out “B*TCH!” Sadly, there are few things cuter than a cutie-pie of a two-year-old screaming “B*TCH” and laughing about it. Once again, Bobby and I were in hysterics. We even got it on video. Yes, we are awesome parents! Of course Sophie felt the need to tell her new joke over and over at our house church Sunday night, so Bobby and I had some ‘splaining to do. Soph really raised some eyebrows!
Sophie’s new favorite epithet reminds me of the time Emily and I took Kate and Joshua to the Indy Children’s museum. The whole place is awesome, but as they were 21 and 23 months old at the time, respectively, we spent most of our time in the really amazing toddler area they have there. The kids especially liked the water play area with lots of boats and rubber ducks.
Kate, being the bright, verbal toddler that she was, liked picking the ducks up and saying “QUACK QUACK QUACK!”
Only it didn’t sound like “quack”. It sounded like what quack would sound like if you took out the “a” and put an “f” where the “q” is.
That’s right, Kate was cussing out the ducks! A panicked Emily kept saying, “Kate, can you say QUACK!?” To which Kate would reply, “F***, F***, F***!”
IT. WAS. AWESOME.
Because, as sad as this is, there are few things cuter than a cutie-pie-of-a-21-month old cussing out some rubber duckies.
And it also makes one very popular with the other parents in the water play area!
