So the baby is four months old, and I am finally starting to feel a *bit* like my old self. I only have 10 lbs. left to lose. The Wii Fit no longer says I am a fatty, it says I’m “normal” though I am RIGHT on that line and they way I ate cake at the the 4 million birthday parties I attended this weekend, I am afraid I am back in the fatty zone as of this moment, so I won’t ask the Wii Fit it’s opinion for a couple of days.
I still can’t sleep, so that’s normal, and believe it or not, I have been consistently showering AND putting on makeup every morning before I take Sophie to school. I have two nice pairs of jeans that fit me NOW (thank you Lands’ End Blissdom sponsorship!) and most of my pre-pregnancy tops fit. So I am decently clothed (until summer and I pray I’ll have shed that last 10 by then.)
But I still don’t feel quite back to me in one way. Here on this blog, I feel like I’ve lost my voice. All I can think of to write about is a funny kid anecdote or a whine, whine, whine, post but I don’t feel like I’m…relevant. Like it’s all just meaningless chatter.
I’m struggling. My days are filled with happy things but they are filled with hard things, too. I am not adjusting as well to three as I’d like. I don’t have a minute to just sit and breathe, like, ever. And I try to get in bed as soon as the baby settles down about 9:30 or 10, but he’s been not sleeping so well lately and usually the first 3 or 4 hours is the best sleep I get ever and it’s been getting interrupted a lot…
I have LOST my ability to multi-task. Lost it completely. Can’t do more than one thing at a time. And sometimes that is good, but sometimes it makes me want to hurl myself off a skyscraper. Like when all three kids want something at once.
So anyways, that’s where I am. I just wanted to let you know. I’m trying, trying to figure out how to be me in this new context. I hope you’ll stick with me as I work through it.
You are a great wife and mom and friend and daughter. If it is any comfort, I could NEVER multi-task.
You are awesome. I know I always tell you the same thing, but this, too shall pass!!!! Way to go on getting back in shape!! That has to make you feel better already!
Don’t be so hard on yourself. I still remember my pediatrician saying it is all about survival!! You do what you need to do for now and then you will be able to do what you want to do. It seriously takes me about 18 months, after the child is born, to get back to normal. That is about the time I manage to get a real dinner together, keep up with the laundry (well, that is relative) and keep the house sort of presentable while keeping everyone happy! 18 months!! Cut yourself some slack and don’t let this blog stress you out!! We will still be reading no matter what!!
You are doing great! Hang in there! My 3rd baby just turned 1! Things do get a little easier. Maybe? Um, no not yet
A. Multi-tasking is waaaaaaaaaaaaay over-rated, and B. Mrs. Duggar said to have more kids, they can take care of each other. Her Bon-Bon and book club bills are outrageous!
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Hang in there Jenny! You will find your way. You haven’t lost your voice, you just hit puberty and it changed a bit!
I so look forward to your blogs about things we go through and the hindsight humor in them!
This all sounded so familiar it’s as if I wrote the post….I had my third child almost 20 months ago and I STILL haven’t quite found my groove yet as a SAHM to three. My oldest two are in school, (my middle child just has half days) but it’s still rough most days. I tell my mom, my husband, basically anyone who will listen, how I can’t seem to get anything done! I feel like I went from someone who felt like they always had things together and usually had a relatively clean house to someone who is constantly forgetting what I was suppose to be doing next! I’m not sure exactly how adding ONE more child to our family turned into TEN times more work, LOL! But we love our kids to pieces and it’s no fault of theirs that their mommy isn’t perfect, lol.
Sorry…I have no words of wisdom, but it’s nice to know that other moms struggle too. I know it’s just a period of adjustment for me and my family, and that “this too shall pass!”
There’s no such thing as multi-tasking! Just rapid, switch-curve changes from one task to another (google it!).
Just try to be mindful, and as still as you possibly can among the crazy – your voice will come back!
Trust, as a mom of 3… it takes lots of time. Lots. You are totes awesome. Love you!
Don’t sweat it! I have a hard time focusing on the positive too because life just gets so overwhelming sometimes with all these kids! I love reading about your experiences and I totally relate to them. I poured honey into my daughter’s sippy cup today when she asked for more apple juice. It is a constant battle for me not to put the milk away in the cupboard with the cereal. Should I really have such a struggle with these things? I’m hoping my mind will adjust to the chaos at some point!
I think ur doing great! I understand the lost feeling, I had twins when my oldest was 11! I was full time working/multi tasking supermom and it all went in the toilet. Thought-hey,I got this- I run a company,socialize and still a great mom…HA! Once u get ur order in place, u ALWAYS think the next child will be a breeze and then u beat urself up when ur not perfect. I still think I should be Martha Stewart but eventually I will realize I’m not-lol. As far as ur blog, I am LOVING it! U are back to being u and not just doing reviews,etc. I understand that it has to be a part,esp moneywise, but I have missed ur humor that makes me feel NORMAL! Every night I would ck ur blog to lift me from my funky bad mom vibe and make me laugh. Thank u for all u have done and continue to do!!
It is a difficult transition, especially when #3 wasn’t planned. My #3 was like that, but only 18 months younger than his sister. It really, truly does get easier. Hang in there!
Multitasking? What is that????? I stay at home full time with my son that is 2 1/2. Yep, that’s it……1 child. And I feel like I can’t get anything done ever!
I think you are doing a great job! Stay positive and things will get better!
And I will keep reading as long as you keep writing:)
It sounds as if you are doing a great job! And I love your posts, too. It is good to read other bloggers who aren’t perfect. It took me time to acclimate to having 2 kids- I can’t imagine throwing another one into the mix! Keep positive and keep on blogging. You are doing a beautiful job with your mom voice on the blog, but I’m sure you’ll soon find your non-mom voice too!
Be easy with yourself. Finding a new rhythm takes time, but it will happen. Write what’s relevant to you – it’s your blog, after all! I hate that the world says we should bounce back immediately after having a baby, as though we haven’t had a baby at all. Please just give yourself some time. As much time as YOU think you need. Not how much time you think everyone else thinks you need, if you follow me. Hang in there – you’ll find your groove eventually, and until then, massive hugs from Australia.
I just wanted to say that this post and everyone’s comments make me feel a lot more normal for feeling like I’m losing my mind/grip most days. thank you everyone.