Posted on by Jenny

Unprepared

In approximately 30 days I am going to have a baby.

30 days.

In 30 days I will go from two kids to three. I will have an almost-7-year old, a 4-year-old, and a newborn.

I know it, but I can’t really comprehend it.  On the outside we’re ready; crib, diapers, clothes, car seat – all ready.

But on the inside?  I don’t know.  I’m fairly terrified.  I’m so excited to meet my baby, and so TIRED of being uncomfortably pregnant, but I’m scared.  There’s so much I don’t remember about having a baby.  I have two children who already need, need, NEED me.  How can there be anything left?  Who will meet their needs when I am constantly breastfeeding for the next zillion months?  Will they resent the baby?  Will they resent me for spending so much of my energy on him?  Will they understand that I love them as much as ever?

It wasn’t that hard for Joshua to accept Sophie into our family.  But for Sophie, I think it’s going to be much more difficult to accept Jonah.  She’s been the baby for four years.  And I’m still not convinced she “gets” it – I don’t think she will get it until we bring him home.

Transition scares the pants off me.

But, it’s coming.  Like a freight train with failed brakes!  Jonah has already made his way into our hearts and soon he will be in our HOME.

I just hope I live to blog about it!

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13 Replies to “Unprepared”

  1. Jenny – We went from 2 to 3 kids in May and I felt the same way. Our first two were 19 months apart, so everything “baby” was very fresh in our minds. Alex wasn’t old enough to really understand, and everything went very smoothly. Our third was three years behind (5 years younger than our oldest) and I really worried about how the older two would handle it.

    I can’t say it wasn’t crazy in the beginning (and sometimes still is!) It gets easier and the boys LOVE their baby brother and are nothing short of fantastic with him.

  2. I was the same way. Scarlett was 4 and Evan was 5 when I had Paisley. I worried so much about the transition for Scarlett. But she really surprised me on how well she did. I am only of those people that say once you hit 2 kids you don’t even notice that there is more. Yes it takes a little more time to get ready and yes normal cars no longer can handle your growing family but for me that is really about it.
    As for remembering things. You will be great. It is like riding a bike it all comes back to you. The best part about #3 is you don’t freak out about all of the things you did with #1. You are more relaxed and really able to enjoy the little one rather than the constant worry of am I doing this right.
    Good luck. And remember YOU CAN GET PREGNANT RIGHT AFTERWORDS. As you know mine are 10 months apart.

  3. Going from 1 babe to 2 was much harder than going from 2 to 3…at least that’s the consensus from me and several of my friends.

    And Sophie will probably do much better than you expect her too. Once again, that’s just been our experience. I thought my super-cuddle-bug-girly-girl wouldn’t handle it well, but was excited to “help” sometimes more than I wanted her to. 🙂

  4. Jenny, I can “second” the three comments I just read. My first two were 18 months apart and then there was a 3 1/2 year gap between the 2nd and 3rd. Hands down, for me, the transition from 1 to 2 was harder than from 2-3. And I also, was worried about how my daughter (child #2) would do, but they both were so excited to be mommy’s little helpers. Praying you will be pleasantly surprised with Sophie as well. And it all came back to me, too. I know you will be an excellent mother of three!

  6. Jenny- You will be a fabulous momma of three and Sophie will be a GREAT big sister! I think you will be surprised at how well she does. I felt the same way right before having Cole. I thought I was going to have the “big one” and I was sure my two little boys would hate me for bringing in some screaming, needy, stuck to my boob little boy. I was So wrong. They loved him right away! They loved helping me {i think that was key}. I thought going from 2 to 3 would be more than I could ever handle but it was easier than going from 1 to 2! You will do awesome. Once you get your routine down you will be good to go!

  7. You will do great!!! I have a 14yr old girl, a 13 yr old girl and a 4yr old girl, and i am old(LOL). We had nothing left for a baby and had to start from scratch!!! Sometimes i thought to myself am i crazy??? Then we had birthing complications, and she had glactosemia, and i felt super old and super tired by this time. But we survived and everyone is great, and you WILL DO GREAT TOO!!! Congrats!!!

  8. Speaking as a mom of 4 kids 6 and under, I can tell you how you’re going to do it. You’re going to drop the ball on laundry, blogging, meal planning, vacuuming, showering, dishes, and whatever else takes time. Because nursing a baby does take time. And the other kids still NEEEEED you, so something has to give.

    I’ve had to lower my standards considerably for the last two months (since #4 came along), but I’m finally getting back into the swing of things. Take it easy, enjoy that beautiful child, and try not to think too much about dust bunnies or traffic for a few months. You’ll do great!

  10. I was exactly where you are just over 3 years ago except you have to add a new husband/dad to the mix. My boys were 8 and 4 when I found out I was pregnant with my daughter. All in all the youngest did feel neglected but he has turned out just fine. They both adored their sister then and now. I know it’s scary but all will definitely be fine…I promise, I’ve been there!

  11. TRUST ME EVERYTHING COMES BACK. I KNOW THAT FOR A FACT. THERE ARE 12 YEARS DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MY FIRST AND SECOND CHILD AND 6 YEARS BETWEEN MY SECOND AND THIRD CHILD. I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO BE LOST TOO. BUT REST ASSURED IT WILL ALL COME BACK. MY THIRD CHILD I BREASTFED TILL HE WAS THREE. I WILL BE PRAYING FOR YOU.

  12. Yes, it will be a little scary, but you will do just fine! Your 2 older kids will be just fine as well. I recently went from 2 to 3 kids, but baby #3 is so worth it and she is what gets me through the days with her cute little smile and laugh. Yes, I’ll admit it is hard, but so worth it. Just know that things will be left not finished, like the laundry, the dishes, etc. Just enjoy your new baby with your older 2!

  13. I think it is a little scary each time you have a new baby, But everything comes back to you. My kids were all born close together. My older two are 12 months apart and my middle and youngest are 10 months apart. When Benjamin was born I was little worried about how Isabelle would handle it she was almost three then. She did great, she loved him and loved “helping” me with him. She called him my baby Ben and wanted to hold him all the time. It may take Sophie a little bit of time to get used to Jonah, but i think she will be fine.

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