2012: Let’s do this!

I’ve never been one to make New Year’s Resolutions. This is mostly because I have zero faith in my ability to keep them! So, I’m not making any this year either. But there are some things I want to, how shall I say, adjust for 2012.

You see, I didn’t enjoy 2011 all that much on the whole. It wasn’t terrible, but it wasn’t great, either. Just writing that makes me feel horrible ungrateful and sinful, because I have SO MUCH to be thankful for and so many blessings in my life. Seriously. My un-enjoyment of 2011 had nothing to do with what I didn’t have. It had to do with what I had on my plate, and with how I handled it.

Having a new baby (third child), and having a child who had turned up developmentally delayed was way too much for me. 2011 was pretty much all about workworkworkworkwork for me. Take care of the constant needs of an infant while working on and being hypervigilant about getting Sophie over her delays. Also I spent the first several month of Jonah’s life battling the postpartum injury to my left hand which slowed me down and left me in constant pain. Add to this financial stress that accompanied the therapies and evaluations for Sophie (co-pays are a b!tch when you have weekly appointments. Especially when you have more than one weekly appointment. And don’tgetmestarted on our insurance only covering 20 visits of therapy per year for a child who needs 50 visits per year…) and the fact that we spent our life savings on our van…by the time summer came around and I had all three kids underfoot all day, still running around to appointments all the time, I was living my life in a constant state of anxiety and panic.

And I was doing my best. I handled it. I don’t think, all that well. And yet. We made it through. Jonah is a thriving one-year-old, Sophie is about all caught up and is kicking butt in school, in therapy, and on all her testing, and Joshua is doing awesome in 2nd grade, and swimming lessons, and it seems so far has retained only *slight* emotional scarring from having an angry mommy all summer.

So 2011. You kicked my butt. I was not even close to being a worthy opponent for you. I am not sad to see you go!

2012:It’s nice to meet you. I am already looking forward to how much better I am going to handle you than I did your predecessor! Mostly because my known circumstances are just plain going to be easier this year, but hopefully because I’ve grown and learned some things in the past year as well. I am not dumb enough to assume you won’t throw me any curveballs, but I’m optimistic enough to think I can knock them out of the park this time.

Happy New Year everyone! What are your hopes for 2012?