Hell froze over and whatnot.

So remember that time Jenny told me I shouldn’t get a dog?

She was totally right.

However, against my better judgment, we did it anyway.

A few weeks ago, we brought a dog home from a shelter. Have you ever tried adopting a dog from a shelter? I am fairly certain we could have brought a kid home from Rwanda with less scrutiny. Anyway, after we convinced them we weren’t Michael Vick wannabes, we brought home a dog whose name (at the time) was Yonkers. He had been adopted from the shelter as a puppy and was in a home for five years, but his owners got smart had kids and couldn’t care for him anymore, so he wound up back at the shelter. So anyway, this was the only dog we had come across that we all felt remotely comfortable with (and by “remotely,” I mean not 100% opposed. And by “we,” I mean me.), in no small part because he was not a puppy. I am not a complete idiot – I drew the line at bringing anything into our house that wasn’t sleeping through the night and potty-trained. Because really – that ship has sailed.

So.

The shelter’s policy is that interested parties bring a dog home for a week-long “home visit” before making the adoption final. (See also: Rwandan child.) I held out the slightest bit of hope that a week would be long enough for all of us to realize that we didn’t need a dog.

I was wrong.

I realized it. The rest of my family, not so much.

But let me back up. The night Andy brought him home from the shelter, it was a Friday and the kids and I were in my bed watching television. Andy and the dog got home, and the dog’s first course of action was to tear through the house and jump up on our bed. I was not amused. Then he proceeded to bark the entire night. Kate, the girl who flips out when she can hear crickets chirping when she’s trying to sleep, was hysterical. She wanted the dog to be gone, and I quote – “Mommy was right. We aren’t ready for a dog.” I was gleefully chanting “I told you so!” in my head and picturing returning the purchase the next day.

Unfortunately, it didn’t last – the next morning she was in love with the damn thing.

I, however, was not.

Since Andy and the dog had gotten home late the night before, Andy had put the dog’s crate (which was gianormous, btw) in the kitchen. I came out to make the kids breakfast and the kitchen table had been moved to the side to make room for the crate, there were dog treats on the counter and leashes and toys strewn across the floor. I felt like the dog had taken over our entire home. Our house suddenly felt three times smaller, and the dog suddenly seemed three times bigger than I remembered. Later, Andy found me in the shower, sobbing. I just felt like our lives had been turned upside down – and I had liked our lives quite well just as they were.

Mid-morning, I took Kate to a birthday party for like 7 hours. It was so long I wanted to shoot myself. But being there felt like a better alternative than being at home with the dog – I was utterly convinced I would never want to be at our house again, especially alone. That thought was devastating to me.

After the party, I took Kate to the mall to kill some more time. When we did eventually get home, I discovered that Andy had spent the whole time getting our house back to normal. He moved the crate and all the paraphernalia to the basement and cleaned the entire house. It felt like home again and it was such a relief to me. He is a nice guy.

So anyway, after the initial shock wore off, things got better… but the conclusion I came to was that I just didn’t like having a dog in our house. It wasn’t about that dog in particular – all and all he’s a pretty good dog, and Andy and Kate had absolutely kept up their end of the bargain in terms of caring for him. It just felt like an intrusion.

To me, anyway. Everyone else – including Sam, who had been completely afraid of dogs a week before – loved having him around.

So, our week came to a close and we had to make a decision. It was not easy. I agonized over it, but after a long conversation with my dad, I decided that I would take one for the team.

We are now dog owners.

While I am still not overjoyed about this change in our life, I am trying to come around. I have decided that at this point, it’s in no one’s best interest for me to be angry and resentful. The dog is here to stay, and I need to make the best out of it. That’s what’s best for all of us.

So, readers, meet Siggy.

On the bright side, at least I’ll have something to blog about.

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Can I borrow your Xanax?

I don’t know if it would be Jenny or me who would use it, but one of us is going to need to.

You see, Thursday we’re flying to Miami. And Sunday we’re flying home.

Which means, chemicals are in order.

Jenny is a bit of a nervous flyer. She’s also nervous about:

Missing our flight out of Dayton. Because, you know… well, I don’t know what could possibly happen to cause that, but whatever.
Missing our connection out of Atlanta. We have an hour and 45 minutes between flights, and both are Delta so I’d imagine the gates are both in concourse B. (ATL and I are going to be BFF after this week is over, as I will have been there four times in 11 days.)
Our luggage not arriving. I would say this is #1 on Jenny’s “things to freak out about” list. Basically, I think, because our luggage will contain our new fabulous Lands’ End wardrobes. And let’s face it, losing them would be tragic. However I don’t think it’s likely to happen!
Missing the Mom 2.0 White Party. Again, not sure what she thinks might happen, but believe me she is all hyped up about it.
— (This one might be my favorite.) A super-awesome person might ask Jenny to go on a photo walk, and Jenny won’t have anything to wear because all our LE clothes are dresses. Do not ask me how she dreamed that one up, but she was serious enough about it that she ordered a pair of LE shorts just in case.

What am I missing, Jen?

On the other hand, my list of much-more-reasonable stressors is as follows (shockingly, most are of the social variety):
Flying with Jenny. Fortunately, thanks to my stint in first class last week, I know that Delta serves vodka tonics. $7 a pop will be well worth it.
Hugging. I am so socially awkward that I never know when hugging is appropriate and when it’s not. Basically I never initiate hugs and then look like a jerk. Or at least I think I do.
People we don’t know not understanding that Jenny really does not take herself seriously. You see, she’s posted things like “I think I’m hilarious” and “I don’t know if you all have heard, I mean, you MAY have missed it but I think I’ve mentioned once or twice that Emily and I? Are FREAKING FABULOUS!” and whatnot and shameless self-promotion (even though she’s joking!) makes me nervous! But Jenny is about 1000 times less socially awkward than I am, so I’m sure it’ll all work out for her and she’ll have 45 new BFFs before the weekend is over.
Elevators. Jenny. Enough said.

So, yeah. Can I borrow your Xanax?

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I’m going to Disney World (and I’m going to eat. A lot.)

Again.

I know, Dad, I know – we go there every 18 months. (Totes not true, btw, we haven’t been there since October 2010, so it’ll be 20 months by the time we get there. But it’ll have been three years since the kids have been there so we’re not completely out of control. No we’re not!)

Well if that wasn’t a little glimpse into my psyche.

Anyway.

I’ve been waiting on tenterhooks for Disney to release their fall free dining dates, and yesterday they finally did. If you’re traveling between August 25 and September… oh, just go here if you want to read about it. But the short version of the story is that we’re going to Disney and we’re going to eat for free.

If you like eating as much as Andy and I do, that’s a very big deal.

So, as soon as I booked the trip, the race was on to get our ADRs (advanced dining reservations for you non-Disney freaks). Planning our meals is one of my very favorite things about planning Disney trips (see above, re: like to eat). This time around, we’re going with a few old favorites and trying a few new places too, and I couldn’t be more excited.

We have ADRs for…

Hollywood & Vine at Hollywood Studios. Breakfast with Handy Manny, Special Agent Oso, and Jake and the Neverland Pirates. This one is mainly for Sam, but who doesn’t love Mickey waffles?
Mama Melrose at Hollywood Studios. The main reason I booked this one is for the Fantasmic package – dinner guests get special reserved seats at Hollywood Studios’ end-of-the-night show. Fantasmic is one of the few major Disney World attractions I’ve never experienced, and I’m very excited!
Liberty Tree Tavern at the Magic Kingdom. This is another new one for us. I’ve read good things about it and I hope it lives up to the hype. I generally think the Magic Kingdom food leaves much to be desired, but hopefully this will surprise me!
San Angel Inn in Epcot. We ate there a couple years ago the day after we ran the Disney Wine & Dine Half Marathon, and it was about the best meal I’d ever had in my life. The wide selection of margaritas didn’t hurt anything.
Tusker House at the Animal Kingdom. This is also a character breakfast – Donald and his friends decked out in their safari gear. This serves two purposes – it fulfills the required Mickey et al character meal and also gets us into the Animal Kingdom before the park opens, so we can go straight to Kilimanjaro Safaris, which is supposed to be amazing first thing in the morning.
‘Ohana at the Polynesian Resort. This is a new one for us too, and it’s a Hawaiian-themed dinner show.

Sounds great, don’t ya think? Those are our “table service” meals. Our free dining plan also comes with one “quick service” meal per day. Some of our favorite quick service stops include Cantina San Angel in Epcot and Wolfgang Puck Express at Downtown Disney.

Needless to say, I am geeking out about all the planning involved in getting ready for our trip (not just the food, I swear! That was just the most pressing matter). I’ve renewed my subscription to TouringPlans.com, and I’ve got a spreadsheet detailing the best and worst parks for each day and which day we’ll follow which touring plan of attack. They even have an iPhone app that shows current wait times! I think my iPhone might replace my trusty little notebook that contained all my spreadsheets the last time we went. Ah, technology. An OCD nerd’s best friend.

Wooooohoooooooooo!!!!

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(You can find my Top 10 Disney Planning Tips here. At least those were my best tips before we actually went – here’s what I learned while we were actually there!)

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