The Milk Maid & the Dairy Queen

A couple of days ago my mom called me with a good joke. “I saw Elisabeth Hasselbeck on the View with her new baby,” she said, “And she’s calling herself the Dairy Queen because it wants to nurse day & night, night & day. So, I thought you should call yourself that, too.” With that she gave a little “tee-hee” in reference to Sophie’s ardent love of nursing. Oy. Unlike the Dairy Queen down the street from my house, THIS DQ is open all winter at least. Yikes!

Saturday Sophie earned herself the title of Milk Maid to my DQ. She was eating an afternoon snack in her high chair (and I was – what else? – filing coupons!) and I’d given her a straw cup of milk. She will usually drink an ounce or two and then do what she does when she’s done with anything – unceremoniously throw it on the floor. It’s one of her signature moves. When she’s done with a toy, a food, whatever, she just chucks it and moves on. Well, this time when I heard the cup hit the floor, I noticed it wasn’t as full as usual. As a matter of fact, she’d downed almost all the milk! My heart skipped a beat in excitement! Could it be that she was moving toward loving the cup more than the DQ? I decided to see what she’d do if I got her some more. So I gave her another 4 oz. cup of milk, and went back to filing my coupons. Then I went into the kitchen and unloaded the dishwasher. While I was in there I heard the cup hit the floor again, and when I went to check on her that cup was DRY. She had drained the whole thing!! Just then the phone rang. It was Bobby, checking in (he was rockin’ out with his music buddies. Jam session. Very cool). I excitedly told him about Sophie’s milk consumption. He couldn’t believe it either! When I got off the phone, Sophie was making her “all done” sign of raising her hands in the hair and then clapping for herself. So I went to get her out of her chair. She was wearing a little pink velour hoodie (thanks Bethany!) over her overalls. When I took her high chair tray off, I noticed that the hoodie was soaked. When I undid her buckles, I noticed her torso was soaked. When I picked her up, I noticed her BUTT was soaked.

She’d drank and then SPIT OUT at least that entire second cup all over herself!!!!!!!!! And probably half of the first.

Geez kid! Her super-toothless grin showcased her pride. What a booger.

So the Dairy Queen stripped the Milk Maid down to her diaper and took her upstairs and tossed gently placed her in the bathtub for a good soak.

I guess I’ll be retaining my title for awhile. I wish it came with a tiara!! Or at least a Brownie Batter Blizzard!!!