Yesterday was my first day back at work, and all four of us lived to tell about it. Barely. Getting up at 5:30 was AWESOME, let me tell you.
Once I got to work, I was immediately overwhelmed by the piles of stuff on my desk and the 1811 emails in my in-box. And before I could sort through much at all, it was time for a staff meeting. Take it from me – do not go back to work on the day of a staff meeting. Between that and not knowing when and where I was going to pump, I was pretty much ready to jump out the window. Actually I think my 11:00 IM to Jenny was something along the lines of “I hate this!” It got a little better as the day went on, though. Lunch with my friend at our favorite Mexican restaurant was nice, and the afternoon was too busy to be upset.
Andy, Sam and Kate did well together yesterday… they walked to the park and the library, which wore Kate out enough to actually take a nap. Sam, after some initial resistance, took his bottles well, and only had four during the time I was gone. That seems like a managable amout to pump, so I am feeling good about that at least.
All and all, it wasn’t quite as awful as I had expected, although I did miss them terribly. Yesterday also confirmed some things I had been contemplating before I left to have Sam, and I am more sure now than ever that it’s time to make some changes in my working life, and while I don’t really know what direction I want to go or exactly how to make it happen, I feel ready to take action and start to figure out what I really want to be when I grow up.
Thanks for all the support I received on all of my “But I don’t want my maternity leave to be over!” posts. I truly appreciate it!
After having one baby, I gained a new respect for working moms. Now having a second, just giving them both a bath makes me want to put out a red carpet for you! I’ve never been one of those moms who push staying home at other moms. I think moms can be good at both. But for me, staying home was the best decision I ever made, and a huge blessing from God!
Glad you made it. Hang in there. After getting over the emotional aspect of leaving B at the end of my maternity leave, the worst part of being a working mom (for me) that first year was pumping. I was a terrible pumper. I never got good let downs and struggled to get 12 oz of pumped milk a day for much of my pumping career. I found that B nursed more at night and managed with what I was able to pump though, so I’m glad I stuck with it. I was able to pump in my own office though, and had it not been that way, I don’t know how long I would have been able to keep it up. Enough about me – back to why I was commenting anyways:
I hope that you find a path of change that works for you and your family – whatever that may be. Careers can change or end, but motherhood is forever. If you are going to manage both, better to have a job you like going to and that is rewarding to you.
You guys were in my thoughts yesterday, especially Andy, aka Mr. Mom.
Glad everyone made it without a massive breakdown.
So glad things went well yesterday. Going back to work was hard for me, but being a teacher makes it a little more manageable because of all the time off. I can only imagine how hard an 8-5 job would be!!! The first day was the hardest, I’m sure…so it should only get easier from here on out! Good luck!
I’m so sorry you had to go through that! It will get easier, so hang in there. It’s always hard leaving your kids when they’re so young. You are so fortunate to have had your husband there to watch them.