Oh, these children. These children of mine, I love them so much. And I wanted them so much. I don’t remember not wanting them.
And if someone would have told me, when I was a starry-eyed tween dreaming of a family one day, of a cute baby who’d adore the crap out of me, that I’d be hiding from my own spawn in the kitchen sucking down a Mountain Dew and freebasing cookie dough to deal with the STRESS they’d be causing me, well, I’d have said “that sounds like crazy talk”.
But, as it turns out, it’s like, very realistic talk.
No one tells you, when you’re pregnant, or trying to get that way, that although your baby will surely adore you, there will quickly come a time when they adore themselves so much more. And this time is acutally a long stretch of years when the natural selfishness of a child takes over and they kind of treat you like crap. When they can’t see that mommy is exhausted, depleted, or for goodness’ sake BUSY because really, their IMMEDIATE EMERGENCY need for fruit snacks is pretty much all-consuming.
I know I was like this as a child. We all were. And now I am an adoring daughter and my mom and I enjoy a wonderful relationship, so clearly at some point I stopped being a selfish little leach.
So that’s good. There’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe in about 2o years my children will see me as more than a means to an end.
A mom can dream.
That’s exactly how I felt yesterday! Here’s hoping today goes better!!!
Gah. Those days. And the weeks that have more of those days than not. May they be a thing of the past very soon, replaced with appreciation. 🙂
Mountain Dew and Cookie Dough, ya may as well give your Wii Fit the finger! And, BTW, Mrs. Duggar…well, she just flat didn’t know what to say…she’s got the grown ones and the clingy ones at the same time…don’t do that.
UP
Yes, you are right. When I used to teach classes about working with preschoolers, point#1 was that preschoolers are ego-centric. They don’t know how other people feel and they wouldn’t care if they knew. You are also right that they grow up,develop empathy and love their parents. All that you young moms and dads do every day in meeting their needs makes that empathy development possible.
Jenny, you and your bros. were just like you described it!
It’s so refreshing to hear someone come out and admit it! The first two months of mommyhood were so overwhelming and so many of my friends had only told me the “magical” part of it, they left out the part where you just want to pull your own hair out sometimes! Thank you for being so honest!! 😀
Jenny, you have no idea how much I needed to read this today!
A to the MEN!! When I get home at night from work, I sometimes just want to turn back around, walk out the door and go back to work! So kudos to you for being the stay at home mom, cause seriously, I don’t know HOW you do it!!
Ah yes, the fruit snack emergency! We have that one at our house pretty much all the time too 🙂 My son is two, and we made the mistake of buying him John Deere shaped fruit snacks. Now all we hear is, “John. Der. Canny. NOW!” (that’s how he pronounces it)
loved this post. Thanks for pointing out the light at the end of a very long tunnel!
Oh That is the truth. I feel that way everyday. I work and I want to be happy to see my kids when I get home but when the first thing you hear is tattling and fighting oh how you miss your office.