This is my darling son, Joshua. Remember him? The boy who cries over the anticipation of a fire drill and asks me ten times a day if I’ve signed his school notebook because the thought of losing 5 minutes of recess over an un-signed agenda makes him cower in fear? The one who hysterically cried last year when we switched him from first carpool to second carpool (It’s practically like we moved him cross-country!!) My darling Joshua, so very conscientious that the thought of doing poorly in school has caused him to nag me to email teachers about every last detail of project requirements just to make sure we’re doing it right?
Well. That kids has decide to relax in one area of life. Math.
Normally I’d be super-happy that Paranoid Pete has decided to loosen up a little bit, BUT!! BUTTTT!! He picked a bad area to xanax-out in. You see, after several years of getting by on just his smarts, Joshua now has to study for 4th grade math. But he doesn’t really think he has to study, so it’s kind of a problem. For some reason the confidence that I hope he develops in all areas of life has decided to start with his math prowess. And it’s not that he’s not good at math, he is – he’s just not careful. He races through things without reading directions, lets his mind wander and starts adding in the middle of a subtraction problem – things like that. So he needs to study and practice to kind of help get his habits on track.
Which is why I was not pleased when he said as soon as he walked in the door from school yesterday, “Mom, I have a math test tomorrow but I forgot to bring home my book. Sorry.”
After I FLIPPED OUT, he says, “Don’t worry, we did the review in class.”
Me: How do you know you got the review questions right?
Joshua: I just know how to do them.
Me: Well, last time you had a test we did the review together and you missed a bunch and had to do them over again.
Joshua: This time I know how! Don’t worry mom, I promise. I promise to read all the questions carefully and double-check my work.
Me: I don’t understand why you’re not more worried about this.
(Translation: It’s TIME TO FREAK THE HECK OUT, KID!!!!!!!!!)
I am SO IRRITATED AT HIM! If he doesn’t do well on his test, it will be because he didn’t bring his book home to study. And he needs to CARE about that. Ugh.
In other 4th-grade homework related news, I kind of chuckled when I got this text from Emily last night:
I didn’t have the heart to tell Emily that Joshua wasn’t overreacting LIKE HE SHOULD HAVE BEEN! Perhaps if we’d been able to merge Joshua and Kate into one forgetful 4th-grader…we would’ve gotten the proper reaction.
OY!!! I miss kindergarten.
Cross your fingers for Joshua today!
I am still traumatized by Kate’s outburst. I fear for the days ahead (aka teenager-hood).
A blast from the past…my study of child development,etc. Logical consequences…if he does poorly on the test, it will be on him because he forgot his book and MAYBE he will remember it next time.Same for 1st born perfectionist Kate. Parents are to back off according to the logical consequences scenario and let it happen, with the kids learning from their own mistakes. Easier said than done. But an option.
That’s what we were going for the other night – natural consequences. Kate wanted me to write a note to her teacher (saying what, I’m not sure), and I told her she would just have to go talk to the teacher herself. She was scared to death she would lose her recess (and more so, that the teacher would be mad at her), and in a way I was kind of hoping she would, because that would make her more careful in the future.
I went through the whole rushing through and not reading carefully thing with my now 3rd grader when the last school year began and now again this year… She’s such a good student but I can just picture her at school racing through the tests just to finish them. *sigh*
Math and neckties are of the devil!