Last week while on vacation in Virginia I got to witness a phenomenon I have been unfamiliar with for awhile: the teenage girl. I mean, sure, I used to be one, but it’s been um, a long time. So I think it is safe to say I hadn’t been in that frame of mind for awhile.
Our best friends went with us on vacation, and their 14-year-old daughter Krisha brought a 16-year-old friend, Kierstin. I have spent quite a bit of time with Krisha, but to see two teens in action was really something. They stayed up ’til 2, slept ’til noon, had water fights, made brownies, and texted their brains out (many times to each other when they were two feet away.) They laughed and giggled and screamed and danced and always had one more thing to do before we could get out the door to go anywhere.
One morning, or actually afternoon, as they stumbled sleepily down the hall after nearly sleeping until lunch time, I felt a confusing pang of jealousy hit me like a hammer. Jealous? Why would I be jealous? “Who wants to go back to their teenage years?” I asked myself. “The angst, the hormones, the social jockeying, the identity crises? No thanks.”
Yet somehow, I couldn’t talk myself out of envying them. Maybe I’m viewing history with rose-colored glasses, but I remember my teenage years as being pretty carefree. I saw in Krisha and Kierstin the things I used to have and be and do (minus the texting) when I was their age. I miss the sleeping in, the eating whatever I want, the not having bills to pay. I love being a wife and a mother – the blessings God has given me are boundless – but at times I tire of having the weight of such an important responsibility on my shoulders. I can’t say I feel that way every minute of every day, but at that moment, the Fabulous Life of Krisha and Kierstin (which should tootally be a Disney Channel show) looked pretty darn good. I mean, I don’t want to shop at Hollister or anything but sleeping in once in awhile and not having a checkbook would be grreeeaat.
So. There it is. Another one of my numerous flaws. Anyone else wanna move back in with mom and dad and catch rides to the mall?
Don’t worry, you’ll have a teenager of your own in approximately five minutes. LOL! My daughter turned 13 – I swear to you, she was just starting kindergarten like two years ago.
I was so with you until you said I’d have to move back in with the parents and give up my car… Maybe I don’t want to be a teenager again. But ask me again tomorrow morning when the babies wake up at 6am…
I am sooo in. For a day. OK, a weekend.
If you’re flawed then I am too, because I yearn to be so carefree and taken care of like that again. But, those girls are looking at you too, seeing what you’ve got and wishing they had it.
You are just realizing what you had then, back when you didn’t have to appreciate it because having no responsibilities makes you blind. You can see now, that’s all.
I wish I could go back knowing what I know now – then I would’ve enjoyed it more and not been such a SPAZ about things that really didn’t matter in the grand scheme of things.
I think vacation really makes you wish you were a teenager again! Vacation used to be relaxing and carefree…and, well, FREE! I actually loved living with my parents and being around my family all the time. Sometimes, now, it seems lonely when the house isn’t full of people! I’m with ya, girl!
Great post, Jenny. Very insightful comments from all of your readers,too.I am with Piper – the girls got a good picture of what their futures could be, if they make the right choices. They saw the young couple with beautiful lilttle ones and the sixties couple who still love each other dearly. Of course, Daniel and Luanne are a constant picture for their daughter.
We had some good times as teenagers, and we had great parents raising us too. I can see that now, at 30, while at 15 things didn’t seem quite as rosy. One other thing that stands out to me, is that we have something that not everyone is so lucky to have; good friends that have been supporting us (and vice-versa) since we were kids and still are actively involved in our lives. What a treasure!
When I look back on the past, all of the best times were shared with people still in my life today, except for the few loved ones who have passed away. I think perhaps it mattered more who was there, than the event itself. I hope that I can help B choose her friends wisely and that she is blessed to find such wonderful people as she grows up.
I am so there with you. I constantly look at my kids and think, “Do you know how lucky you are???”
Yes, I see that in my son all the time.. I see how he is pushing to grow up, he is 14 has a debit card already (our bank issues one so kids can learn about money but I say it’s just hurting him because he hasn’t earned a majority of the money that he adds to the account) He wants to drive all the time (I started driving at 14 so this isn’t unusual for me).. so I just feel like I know I grew up too fast… I’ve often thought about what my husband and I would do if we ever lost our house (I lost my job in April and his work cut back to 32 hours in May) and moving back in with my parents would be awesome! we could save SAVE SAVE and do what we wanted.. come and go as we please because we would have 2 extra people helping with everything.. yeah it would be great!!
What’s tragic, is that I spent my teenage years thinking my life was so HARD. Ha! I would like to go back and tell myself to enjoy the good days while they lasted!
I often think about “the good old days” of no responsibilities. However, all the other stuff that went along with it would keep me from going back!
But I think it would be nice to recreate the feeling by having a vacation at a resort, doing nothing but sitting on the beach or by the pool, sleeping in, and having people wait on me. Sound good?
I feel the same way sometimes. I am a teacher at an all girls high school (the same school i went to long ago) and sometimes I get so jealous of the freedom that the girls have. They can be silly and giggly and really have no responsibilities. However, I also see (and remember) how hard it is to be a teenage girl. Things that seem so small can CRUSH them for days. So while I miss the freedom, I do not miss the feelings and drama at all.
You could not pay me all the money in the world to go back to my teenage years. But I could use some sleeping in. I would move back with my parents for a weekend if I could sleep all day.
Totally do not miss the drama and the boy-craziness. Of course, I was….uh….homely, so every boy I liked did not reciprocate. Now at least I have a “boy” who loves me to pieces and I don’t have to go scrounging for one who likes me.
Now the metabolism part. Yeah, I SO want that back!
I would go back to my teen years in a heartbeat if i could got o early teens because my dad died when i was 15 and i would love to go fishing with him one more time or be grounded and have to sit with him and watch his shows one more evening. or sneak out with my dad for father daughter ice cream again. I would re live it all for any of those chances.
Candy