Let me just say that over the past several days, my two youngest children have started conspiring together. Conspiring to kill me.
That’s right, Sophia Diane, who can now finally take the title of “Bitter Middle Child” and run with it, and my Kidney Bean baby (as he or she appeared to be on ultrasound Monday, a kidney bean with a heart beat!) are trying to do their mama in. The “morning sickness” has really set in this week, and by “morning”, I of course mean “all freaking day and night”. I’ve been fairly miserable and non-functional, and slightly bitter about it. Yesterday Kidney Bean treated me to a new pregnancy experience: the “Splashback”. That’s right, I vomited so violently that it splashed back up out of the toilet and into my face. Kind of ruins the 30-second relief you usually get from nausea after puking. I was in our teeny-tiny half-bath when this lovely event occurred, and when I whirled around to get to the sink to, you know, wash the puke off my face, I hit my head pretty good on a part of the wall that sticks out where our laundry chute is. It hurt like a mother for the rest of the day, and still hurts this morning, and I have a lovely bruise over my left eyebrow. Which is great, because I was looking a little pasty.
Anyhoo.
To add insult to injury, Sophie-pants has decided that starting last week, she is A) not going to take a nap any more and B) start getting up about 45 minutes earlier in the morning (HOW do those two things go together Sophie?? HOW??) and C) not go to bed any earlier.
Being that by late afternoon I am dying to lay down for a bit, this is very sad news for me indeed. And since the only time I don’t feel like CRAP is when I’m ASLEEP, it’s a double-whammy.
Blargh.
I’m pretty sure the two are in cahoots. Perhaps Sophie already has the older-sibling power of manipulation over this baby even as he or she is still floating in a pond of amniotic fluid. Who knows? Maybe it’s a coincidence, or maybe I’m just doomed.
One thing is for sure, though. I am fit to be tied. And so are my tubes.
By me. You forgot that part.
Oh man!! Another reason I need a mini-van! I wish I could come get Sophie for the day. Let her and Evan entertain themselves during nap time, because I’m not above locking both of them in his room. HA!! That sound funny doesn’t it? Maybe if we could arrange a MiniVan for the rest of you 1st trimester we could work something out 🙂
Miss you like crazy. Feel better!
Small price to pay for a miracle! 😉
oh no! I hope you are feeling better and that Sophie lets you get a bit of rest. Doesn’t she realize that there are many sleepless nights ahead of you after the baby is born. Oh wait, she is clearly and evil genius and realizes this. Maybe you should hear out her demands and give in to a few of them….LOL.
Call your mom, she’ll help.
this is definitely a conspiracy! did the doctor confirm you were about as far along as you thought? i always secretly hoped I was farther along than I thought. like skipping part of pregnancy! but finding out you’re two weeks behind where you thought you were sounds like a nightmare.
bahahahaha!! Im not laughing at you my friend- I am laughing with you! You poor girl! and yes that Middle Child Syndrome is a doosey. The day AFTER my 3rd was born- I sent my hubby to the snip-snip doctor!!
Shouldn’t have read this at work. My neighbor wanted to know why I was laughing so hard. He’s a man…and doesn’t understand splashback vomit.
I remember it… And experienced it…several MANY times.
Thank you for giving me another reason why I never want to ever be pregnant ever again. Ever.
That was a total overshare on the splashback…coulda gone a loooooooooooog time w/o knowing that!!
UP
Can you park Sophie in front of the TV while you take a nap? Is that considered bad parenting? I fell asleep twice when I watched Sam the last time. Sorry Sister! Hope the end of the firts trimester brings relief, Jenny.
I feel for you, Jenny. I truly do. I, also, had many a splash back. Have you ever taken Zofran for your sickness? I don’t know how bad it is for you or how long it lasts, but I do know, regardless, how hard and frusterating it can be to care for any one else when you are so sick, especially a 3 year old. I had to be on a Zofran pump for 3 months with my last pregnancy. Anyhow…just wanted to throw that out to you and also wanted to offer to come get Sophie for you sometime if you are comfortable with that, as I do have a mini van. Would she be ok with that or is she stranger wary? I really would love to give you a break, as I know how desperate one can feel. Just let me know.