These past few weeks have been a little crazy in the Rapson house. Since January 9, Jonah’s started preschool, we’ve had like 18 polar vortexes, I’ve had two outpatient surgeries (one oral and one ladypartsish), and we’ve taken Jonah to a dairy-free diet in addition to gluten-free. Because he was having ALL sorts of trouble with his poops, poor kid. But I won’t go into that because Emily would totally remove my admin privileges from this blog. AND, to top it off, we’ve moved him to a big boy bed this week.
So anyway, what I am saying is – there’s been a lot of change/deviation from routine for our family, especially for a three-year-old.
And as I wrote earlier, he’s been adjusting to all this change by being pretty crabby at home. And he’s three. You know, the age at which the Terrible Two’s take some crack cocaine and the kind of steroids that induce rage and have a party for a year. So I should probably cut the kid some slack.
But that cut. It’s one I have a terribly hard time making.
The truth is, I have the equivalent of post-traumatic stress disorder from Sophie’s developmental delays. I attributed some of her delays and behaviors to her being crazy, stubborn, and strong-willed, only to realize rather late that whoops! – she actually did have some social/behavioral delays mixed in there. So from them on, every irregularity was cause for worry. And the truth is, some of it was just her personality. Sophie being Sophie. And some of it wasn’t. And I couldn’t really tell the difference.
Now Jonah is three, and going through some behavioral stuff, which is really not that bad, and probably very understandable, and his overall delays are not even close to what Sophie’s were.
But I can’t relax about it. I worry about every little fuss, every fit, every refusal to communicate what he wants.
I can’t cut him any slack, and I can’t cut myself any slack. I choose to worry. I don’t want to choose it but I do. I don’ t know how not to.
If he has a great day, I have a great day, and if he doesn’t, I don’t.
But overall he is doing so well.
And I am SO proud of him. And I am thankful for that.
I just wish I could rest in it.
Oh my gosh Jenny I was thinking these exact same thoughts on my way to work this morning! My happiness is totally based on Cooper’s happiness. I spend the whole day holding my breath waiting to see his reactions to things.
I saw a pin on pinterest that said something like, ‘my house is ruled by a dictator with a tiny fist!’ Ding, Ding, Ding! That’s me!
I don’t have an answer because I am in the exact same spot. I do think we need to cut the boys some slack. Whenever I speak to someone about Cooper’s behaviors I ALWAYS get the same answer. ‘Well, he’s only three.” I hear that as, ‘OH MY GOD, I only have a short time until he needs to go to school. Help me!’ And these other people want me to relax a bit and let him be a kid. Yes, still do therapy and learning but also relax too.
I don’t know. We need a happy medium.
PS. That picture of him is ADORABLE!