Trying to Leave the House…Without My Head Exploding!

Tuesday my sister-in-law called me and asked what I was up to. “Well, I’ve had a busy morning, ” I repsonded. “I’m trying to get everybody ready to go because Joshua has a doctor’s appointment at 1:30.” Sounds reasonable, doesn’t it? Well, it’s NOT. Because this phone conversation was taking place at TEN A.M. and I was already quite stressed about being on time for an appointment that was three-and-a-half hours away. But ever since I’ve had kids, and especially that pesky second child, it seems it just takes all day to get ready to go somewhere. There’s no time to do anything but get myself and the kids dressed, bathed, etc. Which means when we get home from our destination, the house is a wreck and dinner hasn’t even been thought of! GRR!

This particular day, Tuesday, since Joshua had a doctor’s appointment (4 year check-up!), I also felt I needed to actually, you know, shower and put make-up on. I hate to go into the doctor’s office looking rough. For some reason I feel that this will lead them to automatically conclude that I am a terrible mother and call Children’s Services on me. So, I was able to shower and get my makeup done but I had to settle for a ponytail as Sophie insisted on napping during the time I had allotted for hairstyling, and I didn’t feel I could use the hairdryer without waking her up. She had slept late that day, and I was trying to keep her up until after the appointment, but it was a no-go. She demanded to nap, so I put her down. This meant of course, that I had to wake her up before we left (thus breaking a cardinal rule in my household, “Never wake a sleeping Sophie!”), so that we wouldn’t be late. (I was taking her to my other sister-in-law’s house so she could play with cousins rather than terrorizing me during Joshua’s appointment.) Since I had Joshua and myself all ready and had even fed us both lunch, I was doing ok with time. So, after letting Sophie sleep as long as possible, I woke her up and was trying to fix her crazy nap hair when I thought she felt warm. She has had a cold the past few days so I thought I better make sure she didn’t have a fever. I grabbed our ear thermometer, and Sophie immediately snatched it out of my hand and threw it to the ground as hard as she could! AAAHHH!! The thermometer separated from the case, the thermometer covers (you know, those clear, plastic, choking hazards) went EVERYWHERE, the battery cover popped off the thermometer and went under the coffee table and the batteries rolled under the love seat. “SOPHIA!” I shouted angrily as I scrambled to find all the thermometer’s parts. My head began to pound. I looked at the clock. 1:05. We needed to leave in five minutes. I got everything put back together (except the battery cover, I couldn’t find it!), and took So’s temp, which was thankfully normal. I gave a sigh of relief and put her coat on. I looked at the clock. 1:07. Then Joshua piped up, “I have to go POOPS!” My head started pounding harder and I swear my vision blurred. “Allright, let’s hurry!” I rushed him back to the bathroom while Sophie followed us wailing (I have no idea why. She just wanted to add to the drama). This stressed me out because you never know with Joshua whether it is going to be a regular poop or a marathon poop. I was praying for an expedient dump cause we HAD TO GET OUT THE DOOR! “C’mon buddy,” I encouraged, “we’re running late, can you do a quick poop?” Fortunately, his bowels obliged me and we were out the door by 1:12. I threw both kids in the car, dropped Sophie at my sister-in law’s, and sped to the doctor’s office. We pulled in the lot at exactly 1:30. Shew! My head was killing me, (it hurt for over 24 hours. Should I blame myself or the weather?) and I was upset at myself for getting so upset! I don’t know why getting out of the house has to be such an ordeal, but it always is. I don’t know why I feel that being two minutes late at any time is the end of the world, either, but I do! And I suspect that my neuroses has something to do with it…more to do with it that my kids’ antics ever will! Ugh!

Post to Twitter

7 Replies to “Trying to Leave the House…Without My Head Exploding!”

  1. i feel the sam way….this sounds like every time we try to go anywhere…….. i think thats why i have just stayed home more than i probably should… i just don’t want to deal with all the drama. i am hoping it will get easier as they get older.

  2. Don’t fret. it gets easier when
    a) your children can go poops by themselves and
    b)no naps are needed (or interrupted).

    I thought it would take forever to get my kiddos out the door too… but things are FINE now. True, Lucy’s clothes are often mismatched and shoes on the wrong feet (she is often afforded the privilege of picking out her own attire), but she’s happy with what she’s wearing, and I am on time. All is right with the world.

    I’d blame the headache on the crappy dayton, ohio weather.

  3. I know what you mean about being two minutes late. I have the exact same obsession. If I’m not five minutes early, I consider it late! Having a baby has made that all very difficult!!! You definitely have to start getting ready WAY earlier than you ever thought you would need to!! My husband just doesn’t understand it, either. For him, we can be 5 or 10 minutes late, and still be “on time”!!

  4. Lucky you tho that your doctor is so close! Mine is 30 minutes away! But we keep him because a. he’s awesome and b. he’s cute…Happy Easter!

  5. Haha! I’m always running late. It’s a terrible habit of mine. I can only imagine how much worse it’ll be when I have kids… you know, like depending on Mom to get them somewhere. Oh yikes! 🙂

    Jane, Pinks & Blues

  6. Ok, I just had to chuckle through that whole post. I know it’s over used, but “been there, done that.”
    But I do promise, it gets better. Now I can say “We’re leaving in 5 minutes” and everyone will be pottied, shoed, coated, etc on time. Well, except the husband. I have to give him a 30 minute warning, and a 20 minute one…..etc….

  7. Oh, I can totally relate – except that I was somehow born without the 2 minutes-late-guilt, so I am 5-10 minutes late for absolutely everything. I just always leave the minimum amount of time possible, and then of course, with kiddos these last minute things always come up and hence – late!

Comments are closed.