I am going here:

Tomorrow.

Without my kids.

Who are thrilled:

But I, on the other hand, am so excited I can hardly stand it.

Thanks to Disney and Maria Bailey from BSM Media, I’m going to a Mom Bloggers Mixer, which means that I get to spend the weekend hanging at Disney World with some seriously awesome bloggers, including Lisa from Crazy Adventures in Parenting, Christine from From Dates to Diapers, Megan from Velveteen Mind, Amanda from Oh Amanda, Marsha from Sweatpants Mom, Lindsay from Surburban Turmoil, Beth from I Should Be Folding Laundry and my girl Andrea from Mommy Snacks.

I know what you’re thinking. With all those bloggers who are, like, a big deal, how on earth did I get on the list?

The answer is – I have no flipping idea, but it must have involved a dart board, someone pulling a name out of a hat, or random.org.

But regardless, I am so there, and I am going to do my best to act cool so they don’t catch on to me and wonder why the heck I’m crashing their cool people party. We all know that won’t work, so let’s hope I can win them over with my charm. Ok I definitely need a plan C.

Anyway, I’m leaving bright and early in the morning, and by early afternoon I should be checking into my very own room at Disney’s Beach Club Resort (did I mention I have my own room? Like all by myself? With no baby monitor?) ready for the weekend of a lifetime.

I’m sooooo excited.

I also have nine million things to do before leaving for the airport at 6 a.m. I have to work all day, present on my final paper at my last class of the semester this evening, go home, hang with the kids, give them baths and give them a zillion kisses to last them through the weekend. I’d like to leave the house sparkling and all the laundry done, but we’ll see how that goes. (I’m sorry in advance, honey).

Oh yeah, and I haven’t packed. I do know what I’m packing, though, because I have done some serious shopping in the last week! Time has been short, but I think I’ve hit every clothing store in town on my lunch breaks this week!

(As an aside, let me just tell you that working on a college campus really does a number on one’s self-esteem. You’re completely surrounded by people who are either A) much more accomplished than you, or B) much younger and thinner than you. My knowledge of point B should have been enough to keep me out of the clothing stores around here that are not designed for the nursing mothers among us, yet it did not. At one point I was pretty sure that firefighters were going to have to come get me out of a dress I was stuck in. I finally managed to extricate myself but in the process I squirted breastmilk on my face.)

*ahem*

So anyway, needless to say I am totally pumped and can’t wait for tomorrow to get here. This will be my eighth (I think) trip to Disney, and my first without kids (either under foot or in utero) and I fully intend to make the most of the fact we’ll have a permanent designated driver the trip.

Expect full reports – more than you ever wanted to know – next week

I have a real habit of self- and google-diagnosing my suspected afflictions, and even determining what medication the doctor should prescribe before I darken the door to the office.

But today I learned that that’s not exactly the best course of action.

I read somewhere online about the effects of St. John’s Wort on minor depression, something that I’ve struggled with for years. I did some digging (aka google searching) and found that St. John’s Wort is often used in place of anti-depressants and that it has similar benefits but less side effects.

Because here’s the thing. Regardless of what is or isn’t going on in my life, I’m a better person when I’m on a low dose of an anti-depressant. I’m a better wife, mother, employee, friend, (blogger? Probably, but it’s yet to be tested) person in general when I have a little prescribed boost in my serotonin level.

Better living through chemistry, that’s what I always say.

But the problem is that I don’t like the side effects this medication has on me. Each time I’ve given it a go, I’ve almost immediately gained a good amount of weight. Which is another thing I’ve struggled with for years and I just can’t stand it.

SO… when I read about the possibility of getting similar results with St. John’s Wort, and after checking it out on mayoclinic.com and various other sites, I bought some and took the first dose last night.

I have no scientific evidence that what happened this morning was in any way related to my self-prescribed medication – it’s circumstantial at best – but it seems like quite a coincidence that this morning I had what I’m pretty sure was the first migraine of my life.

When I woke up, I had a bit of a headache, but I thought it might be allergies because we had slept with the windows open. By the time I was getting close to my office, I was realllly starting to feel bad, and about an hour and a half into the work day I absolutely had to leave. I practically ran out the door.

My headache had gotten tremendously worse, I was nauseated and I just felt horrible. I was so out of it that I was sort of afraid to drive – I even contemplated having my dad come and pick me up, but that would have just delayed getting home, which is all I wanted to do. I called Jenny and talked to her most of the way because I thought it would keep me more alert. I am pretty sure I didn’t say a coherent thing the entire time!

When I got home, I barely had the energy to change my clothes, but I managed to get into some pajamas and I immediately hit the bed. I slept soundly until the middle of the afternoon (which would have been glorious had I not been feeling so awful). When I finally woke up for real, my head was still hurting but all the other stuff had pretty much gone away. I was able to eat some cheese and crackers and watched a rerun of Scrubs. Fortunately, I got to feeling better quickly after that and when it was time to pick up the kids, I was feeling pretty much back to normal.

In any case, the most likely culprit of today’s disaster is the St. John’s Wort. I did some more googling and only found vague references to the possibility of headaches as a side effect (and actually some stuff said it can be used to treat migraines), so apparently if that’s what caused my problem, it’s not common. But regardless, the more I read about it the more I realized that herbal remedies are serious business and can have serious consequences. And should be prescribed by a doctor, not by a dork with a computer and internet connection.

So, I don’t know if there’s a direct correlation between the St. John’s Wort and my crippling headache, but I’m not going to take any more of it just to be on the safe side. In addition, I’m going to talk to my doctor before I create anymore supplement cocktails, no matter how many people on the internetz say it worked for them.

But I could still be talked into the ShamWow.